Doubleplus Ungood

We got so stirred up with other issues here at KIAV (such as the odd protuberance that was dangling from the undercarriage of the company car) that we neglected to mark the signing of the Military Commissions Act of 2006 and the resulting odd bloody death of that pesky concept of “recourse to the law.”

Well, here he is, the “President of the United States” signing the law, hovering over yet another sadly misleading banner. What is it with this administration and the little banners written in newspeak? Whatsamatter? “Doublegood Noexplode Oceania” didn’t fit?

You see, from my perspective, signature of a bill that provides beefed up security at chemical plants, or that improves container inspections at our ports, or that creates a new plan of evacuation of the West Coast in case of an earthquake, those are some ideas about how we could, you know, protect America.

Giving the President of the United States godlike powers is, to me, you know, sort of the direct opposite.

One Downsmanship

“I know the speaker didn’t go over a bridge and leave a young person in the water, and then have a press conference the next day,” said Chris Shays.? “Dennis Hastert didn’t kill anybody.”

Oh, Jesus H. Asshat. Seriously? We’re playing the Chappaquiddick card while the nice lady who sleeps next to the President has also been involved in an automobile accident when she was a youngster that killed a person?

All righty, fine, dummy. Have it your way: Oh, yeah? Well, Ted Kennedy never left the House floor during a vote to mutually masturbate with a teen in IMs.

Nyah, nyah.