I’m Not Not Licking The Debt Ceiling

In case you were wondering, this is what section four of the Fourteenth Amendment of the Constitution of the United States says:

The validity of the public debt of the United States, authorized by law, including debts incurred for payment of pensions and bounties for services in suppressing insurrection or rebellion, shall not be questioned. But neither the United States nor any State shall assume or pay any debt or obligation incurred in aid of insurrection or rebellion against the United States, or any claim for the loss or emancipation of any slave; but all such debts, obligations and claims shall be held illegal and void.

This amendment was adopted July 9, 1868 and is clearly meant to set some rules up after the War of Northern Aggression. But some people have been saying that perhaps it could be invoked to stop all this nonsense about the damned debt ceiling.

Let’s see. The validity of the public debt of the United States…shall not be questioned.

Isn’t that exactly what a “debt ceiling” does? Like, by strict definition? It says, specifically, that hey, when the debt gets yay high, you’re SOL and you’re not payin’ no more? Doesn’t that on its face question the public debt of the United States? Isn’t that, specifically and pro forma or whatever, isn’t that like, equivalent?

So why is some asshole on my TV tonight telling Rachel O’Donnell that it’s not necessary to go the Constitutional route? Oh, no, dear heavens. Why would you want to bolster your argument with some bullshit about the Constitution? Instead, why not begin your negotiations and sparring by giving the Republigoats 76 percent of what they want so they can say no, fuck you, I want 94 percent? And then you can turn and look into camera three and shrug and say the new fabulous Democratic catch-phrase as penned first on this Web space: “I’m not not licking Republicans!”

At my day job for various reasons, the person I share my cubicle with, yes, I work in a cubicle, posted the famous Ronald Raygun quote about you know, Mister Gorbachev, tear down this wall, god-damnit. And so I was thinking about that. Because if you really analyze Raygun’s career, you understand that his little speech didn’t have a damned thing to do with the winds of change. What actually happened was that Commienism didn’t work because Commienism doesn’t work (there, I said it). And also the cost of oil and the Afghanistan war and blah blah blah. But.

But that Reagan stood in that spot and said those words, that has tranfrommed him into a Great Prezident. And that is not to say that he wasn’t actually a shit-head. I’m saying that history will remember him as “Great.” And 69.9452 percent of the reason for that is because he stood in that spot and said those words.

The same, by the way, is true for another lad name of John F. Kennedy. Not in actuality a stellar Preznit. Not really. But he stood on that spot and said them words. And we remember him as one of the greatest Preznits in the whole history of Jesus. And hell, even George W. Bush had one of those moments, one real, genuine, “great” moment, with the bullhorn on the pile of rubble. Those are the moments that make Preznits, and Preznits need those moments.

And we elected Barack Obama I think at least in part because we believed if he would achieve anything, he would at least achieve several of those moments. The genius and passion of his speeches, we imagined, I think, would create many of those moments that you remember where you were when they happened. It turns out, though, that he’s more like that professor who you know is brilliant but you still fall asleep in his class anyways.

He needs to bring the fire, and he doesn’t. The way to bring the fire to this issue is to question the debt ceiling’s Constitutionality. Question its very validity and integrity as an American notion. Blow it. The F. Up.

Once again, the biggest, fattest bomb we have to utilize on an issue, and the Democrats are boxing it up for storage. Why am I not surprised?

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