There is no economy in Joplin, Missouri. Not today.

Oh, come on, Brady. You’re just being your usual commie bastard self. Of course there’s an economy in Joplin. You know, supply, demand, that kind of thing?

No, bubba. When demand is this friggin’ off the charts, there isn’t any supply worth a damn that would exact a toll for it, or that could, for that matter.

Did I mention we’ve got family in Joplin? This was their house. From what I hear, the first thing they did after this went down was to run out to the nearest ATM to make sure they had enough cash to participate in this robust economy. Because you see, to my family, the most important thing is to participate in the dynamic, magical free market that would automatically meet their needs and the needs of those around them, you see.

Geez. That’s so implausible it doesn’t even successfully reflect the sarcasm it’s meant to.

There is no economy here. Supply and demand are so far apart in Joplin that there is no negotiating. Demand is off the friggin’ charts. And supply is all like, ewwww, it’s so muddy and icky, perhaps we’ll just stay here in this nice Marriott in Kansas City.

Certainly, the disaster capitalists will show up eventually, and there will be money back in Joplin. But Nelson Hidalgo doesn’t show up in Treme until the second season, not until after the fat guy jumps off of the boat. For now, there is no supply in Joplin. Only demand. That’s not an economy.

That’s what government is for. Government is supposed to do the shit work in times and places when and where even the most soul-less, opportunistic scumbags won’t go rushing in, when the incentive to work is so lousy that the only funding available to help is the munny that you and I put into the center of the table and agreed, look, if anything happens…

That’s how it works. That’s how it’s always worked. That’s how America works. It’s why Americans found the images they saw on television during the Katrina aftermath so horrifying; because most Americans, even the most tea-baggiest tea-baggers of all of the tea-baggy tea-baggers, most Americans assume that, in America, if you’re ever struck by a real-live disaster, in America, someone will help you. No matter whom you tend to blame for Katrina, that this social contract was left unhonored in this great nation was a devestating illumination for many Americans and was certainly the beginning for a lot of people to start pointing at the naked guy in the throne.

But Republigoats are what they are and they believe what they believe. I mean, it’s not their fault. They’ve taken the suppository. And so you have a guy like Eric Cantor, who’s sitting there nickel-and-diming while my cousins there are trying to track down any remnants of their family photo albums in the rubble.

These people do not govern well. They do not understand government. They do not believe in government. They believe we should all be one giant happy corporation and God Bless America Inc. But there is no economy in Joplin Missouri, and GBA Inc. wouldn’t spare those people two sticks to rub together.

2 thoughts on “Joplin”

  1. Fortunately, everyone came out of it alive and fine. Thanks. As it happens, if you were watching the CBS Evening News the other night, you saw this house as the reporter’s background.

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