A Reality Show Pitch

This new trend of disgraced politicians attempting to redeem themselves/make a fast buck by embarrassing the hell out of themselves on reality television has me thinking: If it’s good enough for Hot-Rod Blagojevich (and/or his lovely wife Patti), and if it’s good enough for Hot-Tub Tom Delay, whose recent appearance on Dancing With The Has-Beens was absolutely horrifying, then why not build an entire reality television program based on this premise?

I’d call it “A Confederacy of Dunces.”

You’d haul guys like the indicted Delay, Gov. Mark Sampson, Sen. Larry “I Am Not Gay; I Never Have Been Gay” Craig, President Bill Clinton, Sen. John Ensign, Eliot Spitzer, Newtie Gingrich, Rep. William Jefferson, D.C. Councilman and former Mayor Marion Barry and other disgraced civil servants, into a small-scale House of Representatives littered with cots. The group is halved into teams and quarantined to separate chambers to hold political conventions, where they must name their party and develop stances on a slate of political issues. Bear in mind, in these political parties, Mr. Clinton and Mr. Delay might be in the same party.

After the 20 minutes of allotted time, they are sent back into the chambers, where they hear an address from President Carrot Top. Following this harrowing day, they visit the commissary, and then they sleep.

The next day, they call the session to order. They must negotiate a difficult obstacle course in order to determine who is the majority party. This designation of course changes from week to week based on humiliating contests. They are then tasked with creating legislation, each party adhering to the planks in the political platform it created.

I think this thing has legs.

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