Category: It’s A Series of Tubes

Faith Aloud

You gotta know about one of my favorite places on the Internet.

It’s called Faith Aloud. Here we go:

As people of religious faith and conviction / Faith Aloud supports reproductive justice for every person. / Because we have faith in women / we support all pregnancy options.

A friend of mine recently got published there. And the result is something very special.

It is a tribute to her best friend, who died. He was a dedicated advocate for choice. She remains at her wit’s end about his passing. My hope is that her ability to memorialize him so eloquently gives her peace.

So go read it. It is a powerful piece. And God bless you Ryan.

Funny. But A Little Too 'On-The-Nose.'

From The Onion:

Area Man Passionate Defender Of What He Imagines Constitution To Be

ESCONDIDO, CA—Spurred by an administration he believes to be guilty of numerous transgressions, self-described American patriot Kyle Mortensen, 47, is a vehement defender of ideas he seems to think are enshrined in the U.S. Constitution and principles that brave men have fought and died for solely in his head.

“Our very way of life is under siege,” said Mortensen, whose understanding of the Constitution derives not from a close reading of the document but from talk-show pundits, books by television personalities, and the limitless expanse of his own colorful imagination. “It’s time for true Americans to stand up and protect the values that make us who we are.”

Buzz Aldrin Is Awesome

This vid from CNN is interesting just for the Mythbusters guys alone. But to see Buzz ” @therealbuzz ” Aldrin, the first man to pee on the moon, clock a landing denier in the head, well, that’s just priceless.

I am not one generally to advocate violence. But I must cheer at Mr. Aldrin’s perfectly natural reaction and to note how much of the horseshit floated by the right wang sounds like the nonsense discussed folks like this idiot who got clocked. Please, I’m not suggesting that anyone go out to punch anyone in the head. But this tape certainly is cathartic.

Meatballs at the Furniture Store

Somebody said let’s make Swedish meatballs at the furniture store
And somebody else said, that’s a stupid idea; nobody’s going to want meatballs at the furniture store.
And the first guy on that first day, his ass was on the line.
And so one customer came for lunch, he knew he had to get rid of the meatballs
And he was like, yeah, you want meatballs from the furniture store?
And they’re like, yeah, I guess; my wife has been dragging them around forever.
Anything. Just whatever. I was thinking about eating an ottoman
A little while ago but then meatballs has actual meat in it
And then the guy behind the counter said, well, I’m not really sure
But ya, ya, sure. So then he takes the meatballs
And he has to put them on a huge plate
Because he has to get rid of them.
Otherwise, you know, the big Swede is going to say
That was the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.
And so now that one fat guy who had the big bowl of meatballs
Now buys all of his furniture there and has told all of his fat friends,
Buy your furniture there because your wife will walk around
And you’ll have an hour worth of eating meatballs
And that’s what happened.

Read more of Glenn Beck’s poetry at Salon. It is stunning that this man is a broadcaster.

::applause::

Why can’t we be fucking finished with Sarah Palin? There is nothing interesting, thoughtful, original, or unique about this idiot, this power hungry mouthpiece for things she can’t comprehend, this fuckdoll fantasy for right wing dudes hoping for restoration by jacking off into plastic Palin’s orifices of pleasure, this dullard, this conscienceless void, Forrest Gump without the skills, this willful tabula rasa who whores herself out to let the highest bidder scrawl her beliefs on her blank brain. She is like an especially ambitious dung beetle trying to push a turd up and over a hill; even if she gets it where she wants it, in the end, she’s still just been rolling shit.

Why by gravity’s pull couldn’t I have written that?

Thanks Rude Pundit via Prog Gold.