We're Gonna Paint the Mother Pink

Kos points out an interesting one. McWeirdsmile’s own campaign confirms the weird nature of the Pick of Prudence Palin, in that the person they had in mind when they were writing the veep pick’s speech. McWeirdsmile’s own campaign confirms the weird nature of the Pick of Prudence Palin, in that the person they had in mind when they were writing the speech before the pick was a guy.

Not anticipating that McCain would choose a woman as his running mate, the speech that was prepared in advance was “very masculine,” according to campaign manager Rick Davis, and “we had to start from scratch.”

The blogger muses:

It would be interesting to see what the before and after versions of the speech look like. What will be missing from the revised speech? What parts of the speech did the Republicans find so “masculine” that they just couldn’t let their VP pick deliver them?

Fortunately, we have a draft right here! Ahem.

Hello. My name is [ male, masculine presidential candidate ]. You will have to excuse me for a moment while I adjust my penis and my testicles.

Ah, that’s better, thank you. You know, when you’re hung like I am, sometimes you have to practically strap that puppy to your own leg.

Now, let me tell you in my very deep American man-voice that Republigoats kick ass! And that Barack Hussein Obama sucks balls. He is bad, and we are good. Just remember when you get into that voting booth, when you see the name “Barack Obama,” think of ball-sucking. Because Barack Obama sucks balls.

Speaking of balls, mine are large and firm, and I have them waxed every Tuesday. I am a man, a man with a penis and some testicles. Would you like to see them?

Thank you, and God Bless Exxon.

So you can see why a rewrite was necessary.

(P.S. The title of this blog post is a MORE OBSCURE THAN USUAL cultural reference. If you recognize it, then you are probably EXACTLY AS OLD AS I AM. Happy birthday to you, too.)

2 thoughts on “We're Gonna Paint the Mother Pink”

  1. You make a strong point. There is nothing masculine or feminine about saying “pay no attention to the issues in this election, just fear.” Not sure what they needed to change.

    BTW, John “Cougar” before he was Mellencamp…MTV contest…Very nice. I’m going to go cover my gray now.

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