I Have One Thing To Say. Sashay. Shantay.

I think it’s time for the Democrats or some non-related corporate person of some sort to really explore and illuminate the subject of repressed, self-loathing homosexuals. Like, there should be a two-hour documentary about it on the MSNBC, for example. Or political spots. And I’m thinking let’s get some guys who are former self-hating homosexuals who have since come out of the closet, let’s get those guys on the Maury Povich show and shit.

Because, like it or not, the specter of repressed, self-loathing homosexuals is a powerful dynamic in American politics. And, more often then not, it is used in favor of the Republigoats. Just look at the latest Rick Perry ad dust-up, for example.

I won’t post the thing here as this is an utterly partisan blog, so I only believe in giving Democrats, Greens, and Communists free advertising here. But you’ve probably seen the thing and it is likely embedded in one of the Web articles I’m about to link to. It’s basically Rick Perry walking in the woods in a nice manly-looking jacket talking about what a great Christian he is and how Obama is a queer-loving Moslem who hates Christmas.

The Week has a nice analysis of this ad, Why Rick Perry is airing an ‘anti-gay’ ad: 5 theories. The theories are:

  • The ‘gay-baiting’ is a play for Iowa’s social conservatives
  • He’s subtly reminding voters that Romney’s a Mormon
  • Perry’s also dog-whistling to the Obama’s-a-Muslim crowd
  • He’s using the ad as a “political beard”
  • Perry wants to tap into the war on the “War on Christmas”

They certainly brush on my own theory, but they don’t quite get there. My own theory is that the ad was actually meant to speak directly to conservative, repressed, self-loathing homosexuals. I mean, I’m not saying that Rick Perry actually is a repressed, self-loathing homosexual. But I am saying that he plays one on TV.

I mean, a lot of people are making something of the fact that Ol’ Rick is wearing the same manly jacket in his advertisement that Heath Ledger wore when he played a repressed, self-loathing homosexual in the film Brokeback Mountain. Ha-ha-ha-ha! They keep saying. Lookit how badly they fucked up here! He’s saying something against the gays, but he’s wearing a totally gay icon of a jacket! Looit how they stupid! Ha-ha-ha!

Has it not occurred to you that the people who made this ad are in television and are familiar with the imagery and ran out to CountryMax to buy him one of them jackets because it would do just what they wanted it to do, which was to speak directly to the repressed, self-loathing homosexuals in Iowa?

I don’t want to brush with broad strokes, but it is pretty clear that if there’s political news that has a guy who is a repressed, self-hating homosexual central to the story, that guy is probably a Republigoat. Larry Craig. Mark Foley (although that cannot be entirely chalked up to homosexuality because Foley was actually a pederast). Ted Haggart. This is the party of the repressed, self-loathing homosexual. So there is a demographic to appeal to there, and I think the Perry ad team decided to go all out, jacket and all.

I think it would behoove Democrats and also actual progressive political parties to shine a light on this issue. I think most Americans might want to know that, if that guy is running some sort of gay “conversion” program, chances are good that he dreams every day of balls on his forehead and has the scars on his upper thighs to prove it.

One thought on “I Have One Thing To Say. Sashay. Shantay.”

  1. That’s an interesting theory. I’m not sure if this ad is airing in other parts of the country (New Hampshire?), but here in Iowa, we get to see it on the TV, not just on youtube videos. The first time I saw it on TV, it was about 5:15 a.m., just before the triple doppler weather report on the local news. Iowa is full of farmers, lots of old timers who have been wearing Carhart clothes, especially the full insulated bib overalls in winter time. I suspect Perry’s costume is targeted to appeal to them, and has nothing whatsoever to do with homosexuality. He’s trying to say “Look, I’m just a regular guy like you.” It’s sort of like when Hilary Clinton was in a bar doing shots with people in the 2008 primaries, or GW Bush posing on his “ranch” while he clears brush.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Anti-Spam Quiz: