Betcha Can't Wait 24 Hours!

I would love to play poker with the people who believe in this 24 hour ticking time bomb thingy. If they believe in that, they will also believe in my inside straight… every time.

Imagine with me for a moment. I have hidden a 20 megaton bomb in Dik Chaney’s septic tank, scheduled to go off in 24 hours. Then they catch me… OK I had set the time bomb to 25 hours, and they catch me at McDonalds having a Big Mac just an hour later. …. Nah lets be fair. I had set the time bomb to 27 hours and an hour later they caught me at MacDonalds having a Big Mac and two hours later they have managed to hustle me into an ultra secret torture place at the Crawford Texas Ranch and NOW they have exactly 24 hours to break me and make me talk… (Truth is they will have to get the information in something like 18 or 20 hours because they are going to have to dig out the bomb and get it on a helicopter and get it either disarmed or out over the ocean where it won’t hurt anyone… but I digress.)

Lets say they have me and I know if I keep my mouth shut for 24 hours, a 20 megaton thingy is going to blow away Dik Chaney’s chili. Think a little water boarding is going to get me to give up the bomb? Smack me around a little, and bang my head against a wall? 24 hours. Hell, some of those boys got waterboarded six times a day for thirty days. Think I am going to give up the possibility of blowing away a large part of the USA landscape with the full knowledge that I only have to wait it out for 24 hours? Who are you kidding? Why did I go to all the effort to bury a bomb in Cheney’s compost pile to start with? I am not going to give it up!! I am going to close my eyes and take my medicine and listen for the sound of sirens. (Just in case there are some actual GOOPer morons reading this, the scenario I am proposing is just a hypothetical… sorry for the big word… just a story I am making up. I don’t really have any bombs, and I don’t have any plan to put one in Dik Chaney’s outhouse. Honest!!)

Imagine if you will that I am actual terrorist. Like the guys who drove a 747 into the side of the World Trade Center. (Again, remember this is just a story I am making up.) Lets say you do what the guy did on 24 and put a gun to my head and threaten my life. Am I frightened? Maybe. Am I going to pass on the opportunity to turn Northwest Washington DC into a toxic waste dump? Not likely. I am going to tell you to pull the trigger. (Which you are not going to do at least until its too late to get the bomb, and probably not then because I am a prisoner… and we don’t shoot prisoners do we?)

One thing the GOOPers just can’t cover up, no matter how hard they try. They are stupid people. This government was run by incompetent, arrogant and stupid people for eight years. They believe in torture because they are stupid. They refused to adopt a rational energy policy because they were stupid. They wrecked the economy because they were stupid. Dik Chaney makes that clearer every time he gets on the telly and tries to sell us on his plan to appease the gods and protect America with ritual torture.

Dikie… the Fat Lady is Singing. Get off the stage!!

One thought on “Betcha Can't Wait 24 Hours!”

  1. Editor’s Note: I swear, PB and I wrote these last two posts entirely independently of one another. From four or five states away. Both thinking outside the box tonight, I guess.

    I didn’t know Boss Limbaugh could sing!

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