January 3, 2011

What A Bunch Of Noisy Bullshit

By Brady Bonk

Let’s get a few things straight here.

1. The United States Senate will NOT blow up the filibuster.

2. The United States Congress will NOT repeal health care reform.

3. The United States Congress WILL raise the debt ceiling.

That is all.

Filed Under: Congress
October 18, 2010

OUTRAGEOUS

By Brady Bonk

A reporter is in a corridor in a public school and is trying to ask a question of a man who is running to be a senator in these Untied States of America.

Before I continue, may I offer a brief definition of a “public school” as “an institution of learning that is financed by taxpayer dollars.”

Private security guards for the candidate HANDCUFF THE REPORTER, drag him down the hall and detain him for 25 minutes.

Before I continue, may I offer a brief definition of a “private security guard” as a “goon who is hired by a Senate campaign for money to be a goon.”

This actually happened. The candidate was Joe Miller, who is running for Senate in Alaska. The reporter was Tony Hopfinger, who edits the website Alaska Dispatch. It happened as Hopfinger tried to ask Miller questions at Central Middle School in Anchorage on Sunday.

This is NOT acceptable.

June 14, 2010

I Don't Know, Dickhead? Who Are You?

By Brady Bonk

I have to say I am surprised by this video of Rep. Bobby Etheridge going apeshit like this.

In my former career as a newspaper journalist, I met Etheridge on several occasions. He is the favorite son of a little place near Raleigh called “Cleveland Township.” He was always an extremely cordial fellow.

Now I don’t think our legislators should come to expect to entertain the requests of amateur ambush journalists while they’re walking down the street in downtown Washington. But this behavior on the part of Rep. Etheridge renders him no longer worthy of his seat. I hope his constituents will review and consider this tape carefully.

Filed Under: Congress
March 26, 2010

Attention Tea-Partiers:

By Brady Bonk

Ahem.

IT IS NOT UNCOMMON FOR THE UNITED STATES CONGRESS TO EXEMPT ITSELF FROM LEGISLATION.

Congress has exempted itself from FOIA, from OSHA, from anti-discriminatory statutes, from minimum wage laws, honoraria, and probably a buncha more.

Exempting itself and the executive from health care legislation is NOT an aberration.

I didn’t say it’s RIGHT. I said it’s COMMON.

Let’s deal in facts, people, and not talking points.

January 20, 2010

The Upside of 59

By Brady Bonk

I can now relay a conversation I had with Mama Bonk on Saturday. I can do so now without, you know…tempting fate.

She asked me what I thought of the election in Massachusetts. I think we’re going to lose it, I said, and I think we should.

MB was a bit taken aback. Why do you hope for that? she asked.

Because, I said, Democrats use that 60-vote thing like a rubber crutch. Rather than trying to legislate intelligently to pass stuff with a simple majority, they’re brainwashed into believing that they have to work for 60 or they won’t even try.

As Thomas Hartmann has just pointed out on the radio, guess what, Dems? NOW YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO PASS SHIT WITH FIFTY-ONE VOTES. The upside of that? IT’S FIFTY-ONE VOTES.

Time to put reconciliation back on the table. Time to get the cots out and make a filibuster a real good ol’-fashioned Jefferson Smith style filibuster. It’s time to shut these assholes out of some meetings, time to hold some hearings, time to get some subpeonas honored, time to force a few 3 a.m. votes. They say people only use 10 percent of the brain—the fact is that our Democrats are only using perhaps four percent of their power.

This latest event cuts the threshold to 51 votes, but it narrows the process. It’s time for our Senate Democrats to get downright creative.

Filed Under: Congress
September 9, 2009

Congressman Joe Wilson Is An Asshole

By Brady Bonk

That is all.

Filed Under: Congress
June 17, 2009

Schaden-Ensign

By Brady Bonk

Update: Ensign has resigned (from his leadership post as chairman of the Republican Policy Committee). News is that he confirmed with Mickey McConnell that he wouldn’t be coming back. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Just to further fuel the schadenfreude, I looked up Ensign’s statement from yesterday to see if, perhaps, the words “I am sorry for being a hypocritical twat” had ever left his mouth. They did not.

I wonder if his tears taste delicious.

I came home to Nevada to come forward and explain to the citizens of our state something that I was involved in about a year ago. Last year I had an affair. I violated the vows of my marriage. It is the worst thing I have ever done in my life. If there was ever anything in my life that I could take back, this would be it.

I take full responsibility for my actions.

I know that I have deeply hurt and disappointed my wife Darlene, my children, my family, my friends, my staff and others who believed in me. To all of them, especially my wife, I am deeply sorry. I am truly blessed to have a wife who has forgiven me. We sought counseling last year and have built a stronger marriage—stronger than ever.

I will not mention any names but the woman who I was involved with and her husband were close friends and both of them worked for me. Our families were close. That closeness put me into situations which led to my inappropriate behavior. We caused deep pain to both families and for that I am sorry.

I am committed to my service in the United States Senate and my work on behalf of the people of NV.

Thank you.

Oh, and by the way, the hypocrisy is even worse than you could imagine: Ensign was a “Promise Keeper.” HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!

*

Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha, hah ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha.

Pardon me for engaging in so much schadenfreude. But I am one who believes that such is the only appropriate response for such incredible hypocrisy.

Ensign is the Republigoat senator from Nevada. He called for President Bill Clinton to resign in 1998 over Monigate. He called for Sen. Larry Craig to resign in September 2007 and called Craig a “disgrace.” Ensign, though, for some reason, did not think that Sen. David Vitter should resign over his proclivity for prostitutes. Ensign also opposes equal rights for homosexuals regarding marriage. Here’s what he’s said about that:

Marriage is an extremely important institution in this country and protecting it is, in my mind, worth the extraordinary step of amending our constitution.

Ensign has now admitted that he was banging a former campaign staffer, who—get this now—IS MARRIED. You really believe in the “sanctity of marriage,” don’t you there, Johnny?

Zip up and resign, you piece of shit.

(Thanks, @Shuster1600 and Think Progress.)

Filed Under: Congress